Kweku’s Korner
After the supply checklist, it’s time to check in. Managing back to school parental anxiety.
By Stacey Orr Smith
Mom, Veteran Educator, Educational Consultant, Parent Educator, and President, Blaquesmith Consulting, LLC
Stacey Orr Smith
It’s not the new schedules, long pick-up lines, school supply lists, and picture days that add stress to the beginning of the school year. In reality, this sense of apprehension can be fueled by the knowledge that it is time, once again; to send our children off into systems that just may not be prepared to provide physical safety, academic rigor, and actual support for social-emotional needs.
We approach this time of year with an understanding that we must be prepared not only to parent and traditionally support students and schools; but with the awareness that we must be armed as advocates for our students. The added stress of equipping ourselves to navigate the external issues that plague our local districts – – impotent school boards, ill-equipped but well-meaning school leaders, micro-aggressions, teacher shortages, un-inspired over-worked staff, and SO many substitutes; is overwhelming for many parents.
We’re spurred on by the understanding that the result of systemic failure will ultimately trickle down to the students, find its way into backpacks, and land on our doorsteps and dinner tables. Managing the effects of a decades long catastrophic comedy of errors is a big task for parents. How do parents fill in the gaps, sidestep the pitfalls, and confidently navigate the rocky terrain that is our local educational landscape?
1. Stay informed and advocate for change. Ask questions. Insist on answers… Watch board meetings online. Schedule meetings with the administrator just to check in. Don’t wait until they call you. See how you can participate in school-wide policy and decision making. Remember, if it’s affecting your child, it’s probably affecting others
2. Seek out like-minded people. Find your tribe. Form a virtual special ed parent group. Talk to other parents. Learn from other parents.
3. Communicate with your children. Do more than ask them how their day was. Get specifics. Get names. Circle back around and follow-up on issues.
4. Communicate with staff. Talk to everyone (not just the teachers). Get to know support staff. Learn the names of everyone in contact with your child on a daily basis. A friendly hello goes a long way. You never know when your child may need an advocate or trusted adult in your absence.
5. Take a realistic look at your child. You know your child.
6. Check on your child’s teachers. Build a working relationship. Have a conversation regarding expectations and let the teacher know that you are there to support them and the process.
7. Understand the Assignment. Stay focused. Document everything. To do this work, parents must be straight-forward about goals for their students. Avoid inherently negative people and disgruntled energy. Just the facts sir.
8. Celebrate the wins. Support positive change.
Be well fellow warrior parents. Fortify yourselves. Practice Self-Care. Stay engaged and vigilant!