Feeling lonely? Appleton’s Community Living Room Offers an Antidote to Isolation

Karen Iverson Riggers and Lynn McLaughlin created a ‘place to just be’ staffed with people trained in emotional CPR. Community leaders across the state want to replicate their approach. Here’s what it will take.

By Miranda Dunlap
Wisconsin Watch

This story was produced and originally published by Wisconsin Watch, a nonprofit, nonpartisan newsroom. It was made possible by donors like you.

Karen Iverson Riggers scrawls on a giant notepad as the 12 people around her call out rules they think should govern the next two days they’ll spend together: “It’s OK to cry.” “Authenticity over correctness.” “Judgement-free zone.” “Say it messy.”

The group — a mix of mental health professionals, children and family workers and curious residents — is kicking off an “emotional CPR,” or “ECPR,” workshop, a community public health training teaching how to assist someone in crisis or emotional distress.

Training leaders Iverson Riggers and Lynn McLaughlin have dedicated the last several years to encouraging northeast Wisconsinites to deeply connect with one another — and giving them a free community space to do so — in hopes they can combat the social isolation many feel today. 

“This is not an individual problem. It’s not like you are doing something wrong because you’re lonely or feeling isolated,” Iverson Riggers said. “This is a community design issue … Lots of folks are being forced to work themselves to death without having any free time to engage in any kind of community or connection.”

The pair founded Ebb & Flow Connections Cooperative, which runs a Community Living Room in downtown Appleton. They describe it as an “unconditionally welcoming” space, where community members can socialize, play games, hang out or confide in certified ECPR practitioners. 

“There’s no requirement to belong,” McLaughlin explained. “You just do.”

Their approach to teaching social connection has proved successful enough that groups in several other Wisconsin counties are now trying to replicate the resources they offer. Plus, several state entities say their model is a method for building connection to prevent suicide. 

With funding from the Medical College of Wisconsin, the pair spent two late-October days in Oshkosh training Winnebago County residents and workers.

Attendees practiced how to effectively listen to and assist people who are struggling, as a means to prevent self-harm and further distress. After the workshop, they’d be considered an ECPR “practitioner” and could go on to eventually work as a listener in a living room.

A place to ‘just be’

The pair’s idea for bringing more northeast Wisconsin residents together was born several years ago, when they were sitting in Iverson Riggers’ living room, discussing the unhelpful ways people typically respond to those struggling with mental health issues. They also lamented the general loss of “third spaces,” or places outside of home or work where people casually connect with their community without a cost barrier.

“So we said, ‘You know, what if there was a space where folks could go and could just be?’” Iverson Riggers said.

That question led them to devise the idea of the Community Living Room, where people could do just that.

In 2023, they received a grant from the Community Foundation for the Fox Valley Region, which they used to launch the concept as a pop-up event in different places — the local library, community gatherings, the children’s museum. There was always food and several ECPR-certified listeners in attendance.

Thanks to the relationships they built hosting pop-ups, a local developer gifted them space to open a permanent downtown Appleton location in October 2024. They pay just $1 in rent annually. 

“It was created to break down all the barriers that people find to seeking support,” Iverson Riggers said. “There’s no appointments and no forms. There’s no requirement of a certain kind of identity or diagnosis. There’s no requirement about how you engage.”

Inside the space, which resembles a large apartment, several cozy couches invite visitors to get comfortable. There are tables to sit at or partake in board games or puzzles. A small kitchen area with a fridge is stocked with fresh snacks. A poster on the wall permits people to take what they need — clothing, food, safe sex tools, hygiene supplies and even Narcan. 

“It just says something about creating a space … where we can go and connect and feel welcome without having to buy anything, without having to be a certain way, without having to conform to whatever the rules of the space are,” Iverson Riggers said.

How people use the space varies. Some simply pop in for a snack or a drink or to use the bathroom. Two visitors regularly come in and practice playing the guitar. Others want to connect one-on-one with the “listeners” trained in ECPR — at least two people who have taken the training are paid $50 per hour to be present.

While the staff are trained to help people who are experiencing emotional crises and are more than ready to assist if needed, the living room aims to be a “prevention space,” they said. They believe that if people feel less lonely and isolated, or know they have somewhere where they can get support, they may not reach the point of crisis.

“You know, it’s not just this joy-filled, ‘everything is peaceful’ (place),” McLaughlin said. “We’re learning how to navigate conflict in community. We’re learning how to support people in distress, in community.”

Since they started offering community ECPR workshops roughly seven years ago, they’ve helped train more than 2,500 people.

For years, they felt they were “pounding the pavement” to spread the word about their ideas for connecting neighbors. Now, they’ve turned a corner and have seen a steady increase in demand.

Community members across Wisconsin, including in Winnebago, Brown, Sauk and Sheboygan counties, have shown interest in replicating their approach. Prevent Suicide Wisconsin also shared Ebb & Flow’s approach in its 2025 Suicide Prevention Plan as a model for using peer support to reduce deaths by suicide.

Thanks to this, Iverson Riggers and McLaughlin expect they’ll soon be “overwhelmed” with interest. The increased attention has come with its own challenges — they had to cut back on meetings with people who want to replicate their approach in other counties. It’s also been hard to keep up with the demands of “chasing down funding” and keeping the downtown Appleton space in shape, Iverson Riggers said. 

Lanise Pitts, a practitioner certified in ECPR, said she was drawn to the warmth of the cooperative and kept returning to events after she attended the training. The Community Living Room allows her to connect with people from different circles and different career paths that she would likely never meet otherwise, she said. 

“When people just come in, it’s just like being welcomed to somebody’s house. Come in, find something to do, kick your feet up,” Pitts said while curled up on a couch in the living room. “When they leave, after we’ve done puzzles or colored or played card games or music games or had a 30-second dance party, it’s just like the weight gets lifted. Like you might come in with a lot of baggage, but when you leave out, you’re leaving some of that behind, and it just kind of dissipates.”

The Community Living Room currently has funding to be open two days a week. See a schedule here. 

Miranda Dunlap reports on pathways to success in northeast Wisconsin, working in partnership with Open Campus. Email her at mdunlap@wisconsinwatch.org.

This article first appeared on Wisconsin Watch and is republished here under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivatives 4.0 International License.